HONESTY

Boy this is a biggie!
Let’s start with being honest – alcoholics, (or problem drinkers), are all pretty much liars. Not only experts at lying to others but to themselves.
I’d been brought up with certain values, honesty being one of them. However, as my drinking got out of control so did my honesty values. Lies would roll off my tongue with increasing ease. I became so adapt at lying that there were times where I actually believed my own lies. One prime example was when I fell down the stairs, as drunk as a parrot shattering my arm. The story I told everyone was that the stair carpet was old and loose causing me to lose my footing. No way was alcohol to blame – (klaxon sound please) BIG FAT LIE; COLOSSALL!
Today I am firstly honest with myself; about my feelings, defects, strengths and behaviour. At the end of each day I write a diary, thinking of each of these things in turn. It’s usually just a very brief entry, not 2 A4 pages!! Sometimes I find myself writing something that I am not proud of but acknowledging it helps me to improve on my journey the following day.
My honesty with others is also paramount; unless of course, as I’ve been taught, it is harmful to myself or others, usually in this case I’ll write it down in my diary – it’s important to ‘get it out there’ because keeping it buried inside can be self-detrimental.
“The cruellest lies are often told in silence” Robert Louis Stevenson

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